This Lent started off very slowly for me and rather than try to rush my experience I was very still and waited for God to lead me. And of course, He did! About three weeks into Lent I had a phone call from my grandmother who had recently moved to an assisted living facility in NY. She said that she was no longer herself and in great pain because of her back and she could not stay in the facility any longer. My mom had taken her to her house until they could figure out the next move. It turns out that the back pain was not due to stress fractures and arthritis as we were originally told, but cancer in her spine. My grandmother was immediately admitted to Calvary Hospice Hospital in the Bronx to spend the rest of her days in their care. Doctors estimate she has about 3 months to live. She is 91 years old. So I of course spent a few days in shock trying to process all of this and so wanting to go and be with her until her death. I knew when she left here, I would probably never see her alive again. This Easter will be the first holiday we spend without her being with us. No matter if we went to a friend’s house or stayed in our own home, she was always a part of the day. Now, it will be just a phone call. And soon, it will not even be that. But we will make a lamb cake using her mold and the torta di riso and remember.

My Grandmother

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